Whatever

Jack Reacher

KillingFloorWe were in the book store on Saturday looking for some summer reading and I was so desperate to find something I would enjoy that I picked up a Jack Reacher novel, Killing Floor.

I have read all the Jack Reacher books and chew through them like I used to with Robert B Paker’s Spenser novels. Because I was sure I has already read this book I kept waiting for the moment when I would go go, “Oh yeah.” But I’m now more than half way through and that moment hasn’t come. Did I miss this book in the series or is it because it was written in 1997 that I’ve completely forgotten it? I’m thinking I just missed it, but the light of recognition may still go off in the next couple hundred pages.

This is a reprint of the very first Jack Reacher book and it has a new introduction by the author Lee Child that tells how he came to write and why he chose the genre, an anti-hero and how he came to name his protagonist. It also has a new round yellow circle on the front cover that reads “See Jack Reacher now in his first major motion picture.”

The introduction adds nothing new if you have visited the Lee Child’s web site, so what I really wanted was what he was thinking about with the much smaller Tom Cruise playing his 6’5″, 250 pound creation. I have heard that he publicly said he was happy with Cruise in the role. I recently had an opportunity to watch the movie and passed on it just because I knew I couldn’t be so charitable.

I’m Insulted

Early this week they put clear lucite sign holders on every single table in the cafeteria. Inside each one is a flyer calling for volunteers to sign up to be a First Responder. Every one in Maintenance is already trained to do this, but they are looking for a few more good (wo)men. They also put one on each of the six tables in what management refers to as the break area out front or what everyone else calls the smoking area.

For the last couple of days they have been putting up wall mount versions in every restroom. There is one on the wall just above every urinal and one on the inside of each stall door. I figured they were going to fill them with more of the please be a First Responder sheets, but they remained empty. Until this morning.

The ones in the Men’s Room out in the Turned Parts Department, near where my cubical is, had advertisements in them this AM. One of the urinals had a Viagra ad over it, while the other had one for Vesicare and each stall had an Ex-Lax ad, one vintage and very modern.

Once word got out about them, people were going in just to look, conversations ensued as to whether they were for real or was someone just having fun. Seriously, how could it have been anything but a joke. I know sales are slow right now, but would the Valve Store really try and make up some of that money by selling ads on restroom walls?

I’m insulted that no one asked me if I had anything to do with it…

Not A Lot Of Bugs, But A Big Surprise

Big Bug SlayerLast night was the 10th or 12th Master’s Miata Club Bug Splat that Donna and I have organized and while it won’t go down in history as a very buggy event, I predict it will be the most remembered.

We start at the south end of Whiskey Road in Aiken at the Red Bowl and finish up on the south end of Martintown Road in North Augusta at a Sonic. Both ends of the trip are definitely “in town”, but in between I try and get as rural as possible, both to avoid traffic and to increase insect impact chances.

Usually there are about 6 cars that show up, including us, so I printed out 8 maps in a fit of optimism. I should printed at least one more. We had nine cars run the route, including some brand new members, some hardly ever seen members and a previous member couple who had also previously won the Biggest Bug Trophy. But no worries, the maps are usually not used at all because Donna and I in the Emperor lead the train of cars along the route.

About half way through the trip, in the middle of a 3 mile section of a very backroad road I had to slow way down as there was a stopped vehicle in our travel lane. The 9 Miatas that started at about a 1/4 mile long line quickly tightened up because of the obstruction. As I got closer I could see that it was a PT Cruiser convertible with its top down. There was a man standing on the back seat facing the side of the road. At first I thought he was looking for a stray dog or something, so I checked the oncoming lane and proceeded to pass. As I started around I realized I was wrong, he was letting loose a mighty stream of urine out onto the side of the road.

Yes, you read that right, while his wife, girlfriend, possibly date sat in the passenger seat he decided to stand in the back of a PT Cruiser convertible and relieve himself.

How Was Your Day Dear?

There was a decent sized piece of the crust (the best part) missing off of my Coffee Cake Muffin at DD this morning. Donna said it looked like someone or thing had taken a bite out of it, but I could see it on the shelf, so it must have fallen off when the counter person grabbed. I wanted to ask for it, but felt that might have come off as a little bit weird.

There were ZERO chicken pieces in my container of General Tso’s Chicken. I should receive a full response via email from the Windsor Foods people within three business days…

Tatiana Maslany was robbed by the Emmys. She was not nominated for lead actress in a drama series. Nor was she nominated for any of the 6 supporting actress roles she played in a drama series.

The new Real Yellow Pages AT&T phone book was on our front door step when we got home. I wonder how long they are going to keep producing these things? A three quarter of an inch thick book can be reduced to a small post-it note on the fridge. We need like two numbers out of it, the SCE&G power outage hotline and customer support for our internet service provider.

Filled up the Sonata with gas this evening and I accidentally selected Supreme instead of the required Regular fuel, thereby negating 30 of the 50 cent savings we had accrued at Kroger.

Late Update: The paper towels were back in the remodeled men’s restroom. Donna said they never disappeared in the remodeled women’s restroom.

The Transition Period Is Over

The building that houses the Valve Store(r) was built in 1973. The offices have been updated several times since we’ve been here, but the restrooms have not been touched. With the icky green floor tiles and walls made out of green glazed cinder blocks they could pass for any interior room belonging to a mid-last century institute for the criminally insane.

Until a few months ago.

Both the Men’s and Women’s bathrooms near the front entrance to the building were brought as up to date as possible with the funds available to a Director of Operations at a medium -sized manufacturing facility. The walls and floors are done in brown hued tiles laid in a mix of straight and diamond patterns. There are new sinks, faucets, vanities and high tech textured plastic stall walls too. Now they resemble the restroom of any non-themed casual dining establishment.

We have new hand soap dispensers (both regular and gritty) and hand lotion dispensers. We also got one of those new fangled micro jet engine hand driers. No paper towel dispenser, but sitting on the vanity was a roll of the brown paper towels that goes in one. At first I thought that the dispensers were back ordered, but as the weeks past I came to realize there really wasn’t a spot left on the wall to put a paper towel dispenser.

Then I figured it was the failed Jimmy Carter mandated change to the Metric System all over again; the new metric units would coincide with the old units until a set transition period past then when we would start using Kilometers and Newton Meters, forgetting all about using miles and foot/pounds. Our new jet air drier would co-exist with the paper towels until sometime in the future, then the paper would go away, but because of mental inertia the towels would stay and eventually the air dryer would be replaced by a dispenser.

I was right about everything except for the failed part. The transition period was over; on Monday there was no roll of brown paper towels in the restroom. There was no roll Tuesday. Not today either.

Started up, went down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 10/24/08: 1239

Rachel Green Does The News

The Rachel

I guess Jennifer Aniston was fed up with all the Hollywood nonsense after her 38th failed attempt at marriage (this one was going to be to Justin Theroux) and left that paparazzi infested place for small town America. Augusta, Georgia. But she just couldn’t stay away from the TV business entirely because she took a job as the morning /mid-day anchor at the local CBS affiliate, WRDW.

Just kidding, that is really Jessica Dill, but when I first saw that haircut the other day…