What Time Is It?
I don’t remember exactly when, probably sometime around 12 or 13-years old, I decided I wanted to be more grown up. So I asked for a watch for Christmas. It was probably a cheap Timex wind-up one with a plastic band that looked a lot like the one on this Etsy page, but cost about one tenth what that person is selling that one for. The plastic band broke after about a year and I replaced it with a leather one and I probably wore that watch until I was 18 and joined the Navy.
Within the first few days of boot camp you are issued your uniforms. You then are taken to the PX where they gave you a very specific list of items to buy, a Gillette Safety Razor, one ten pack of blades for the razor, one 6 ounce tube of Crest toothpaste, etc. When you checked out, the total cost of what you bought was recorded and that money came out of your first paycheck. You then boxed up everything you came through the gates with, in a box and mailed it home, including your watch.
One of the items on that PX list was a specific watch, probably a cheap Timex similar to what I already had. Because the military has to run like a finely tuned machine its members have to be at certain places at certain times, the watch was required. If you never wore a watch before, too bad, you were going to be wearing one now. So I wore various watches for the next ten years while a member of Uncle Sam’s Yacht Club.
When I left the Navy I stopped wearing a watch. Partially to free myself from that very structured life and partially because there are clocks everywhere anyway, in the car radio, on the walls and, if you could program a VCR, right there near your TV. Bill Gates put one in the lower left of your computer screen and now your smart phone is always at hand, so who wears a watch anymore?
No matter, when you retire from ASCO (at least as a salaried employee) they are going to give you the traditional gift of a watch. When Donna retired last year she tried to get out of it, she doesn’t wear a watch either, she said donate the money to a charity or something. No dice. You get a catalog with about 10 or 15 styles of watches to choose and they engrave the back with your name and years of service. With the help of the HR Benefits person they picked out the most expensive ladies watch for her because she was going to sell it and donate the money to a charity. We have even gone so far as taking the watch to a local jewelers and for ten bucks had him buff off the engraving of her name. We have yet to sell it though.
When my time came to pick out a watch I looked at all the options and picked out one that I would actually wear. My thoughts were, the company was making a nice gesture, so maybe I would start wearing a watch again, look more grown up. On Saturday I pulled it out of the box, read the instructions on to set it and strapped it to my wrist. Man, it is a nice looking watch. But it feels weird down there at the end of my arm. Plus the band is a little loose letting the watch move around, so invariably the face it is always where I have to twist my wrist an extra bit to see it. I pull the strap tighter to get to the next hole on the strap. Now it is too tight, my hand will probably go numb after a few minutes.
At this point I remember the real reason I stopped wearing a watch once I left the Navy, I could never get one to fit right. Leather bands with holes (even adding an intermediate one in between existing holes), metal bands with butterfly clasps, whatever the closure method they were always either too loose or too tight. I bet I could still make this work, poke an intermediate hole, wear it every day for a couple weeks until I got used to it, but my heart really isn’t into it. I really don’t need a watch, I’m retired. Besides, remember smart phone, computer screen, car radio, wall clock, etc. I guess I’ll go get the back engraving buffed off and put a pair of his & hers watches for sale up on eBay.