Year: 2016

Politics as Unusual

Usually every 4 years around this time we here at Life of Brian headquarters announce our endorsement for President of the United States of America. Usually it is a third party candidate based on the car they drive or their stance on marijuana legalization. This year we have no one who falls into the correct automobile category, but we do have one that is head and shoulders above anyone now, or anyone previously, on the “Cannabis is OK” front. Libertarian candidate Gary Johnson would be perfect for our endorsement, except for his seeming propensity for firing up a doobie before giving interviews, policy statements or town hall meetings.

So this year we will will take the unusual stance of not endorsing anyone for President. You are on your own on this one.

Happy Halloween

 

 

me-as-asco-al
Or: Will The Real ASCO Al Stand Up.

Several years ago our company nurse commissioned the son of an employee who is an artist to create a series of twelve safety posters, one for each month depicting different monthly safety subjects, featuring a fictional person called ASCO Al.

Every year the company has a Halloween “Spirit” Week which include guessing how many candy corn are in a jar, a pumpkin carving contest and a costume contest. Over the years I’ve thought that maybe I would join the fun and come in costume. I’m almost perfect to come as Obi-Wan Kenobi (from a New Hope), I even have the plastic lightsaber handle. But every year I did nothing.

Until 2014 when I discovered Steve Wintercroft’s beautiful paper low-poly masks. The first time I scared people with a giant skull. The next year I tried a two for one, I made a jack-o-lantern mask and entered it in the carving contest and then wore it as a costume (winning neither.)

Sometime early this year I decided to put up or shut up and come in a “real” costume. And I knew just what it would be, the real life representation of ASCO’s Safety Guy, Al. I already had the ear plugs and safety shields that fit over glasses. The white gloves are stocked in our tool crib and blue jeans were no problem either, I just needed a red beret and a white polo shirt. The beret we found in a costume shop in Charleston when we got stripes put on the CTBNL and polo shirt came from the local Goodwill store. I was going to use a green Sharpie to put the ASCO logo on the shirt, but in the end I had one of Donna’s fellow MRP Planners create them in iron-on vinyl because she does that sort of thing as a side line. I’ve got a real white mustache already, but because of the beard it needed enhancing, so we bought a 99¢ stick-on ‘satche at Party City that I shaped to fit.

Friday was dress up day and voting began today. I’m fairly sure I’ll get at least three votes, me, Donna and the company nurse, but after that who knows. ASCO AL appears on at least a dozen posters scattered all around the plant in different scenarios every month and is also featured in the company’s monthly newsletter which is posted on every table in the cafeteria and in every bathroom stall, yet still at least half the people I talked to on Friday had no idea who I was.

Tell me who you would have voted for in the comments below:
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Weekend Round Up

Saturday the CTBNL got an oil change and tire rotation at 49,149 miles.
Saturday the Purple Whale got a bath and a massage at Lulu’s.

Sunday the Miata stayed home and the Sonata went geocaching.
Sunday the fantasy football team named after the Sonata went down for the fifth time this season.

Demolition Men

demolition-men

Donna and I went to the Western Carolina State Fair this evening to watch the Demolition Derby. Judging by the crowd, so did a lot of people. The show was scheduled to start at 7:00, but it was well after and there wasn’t any action. Donna said, “If it hasn’t started by 7:20, we’re leaving.” I think they started playing the National Anthem at 7:19. We watched the first heat of six cars, but after that 20 minute session we had had enough.

We then roamed the fairgrounds looking for the 3 for $10 Mini-Funnel Cakes that one of Donna’s co-workers had told us about. This option seemed ideal as we could get one I wanted, one she wanted and another to share. The directions that we were give:, “Once through the main entrance hall it is the first one on the right.”

I asked the girl at the window for the Mini-Funnel Cakes and she said, “We don’t have them, they’re on the other side.” We walked across the fairgrounds to another funnel cake booth, the guy inside said, “We don’t have them and I don’t know of anyone who does.” I recommended circling around one more time. The third funnel cake booth we found didn’t display anything like small cakes and there was no mention of them on the menu so I didn’t even ask.

We didn’t check at the non funnel cake booths, so maybe they were at one of the cotton candy places or corn dog emporiums. Possibly they were available and it was like a speakeasy thing where you have to have a password. Or maybe the Mini Funnel Cakes are like one of those things that pranksters send rubes for that don’t really exist, like blinker fluid or a left-handed monkey wrench.

Sonata Profile Picture

Purple Whale Profile Picture

When I made the profile picture for the CTBNL I was so proud of it I used it nearly everywhere. I used it on Fuelly to replace a Miata photo. So over on the left there was one “icon” representing a Miata and one picture representing the Sonata. The Purple Whale was crying for its own icon. I hated to see him so sad, so…

Another Caricature?

I have caricatures of the last two Miatas framed and hung on the wall in the computer room. They were done by a fellow over in Scotland, Dave Scott, who had a business called Carartz that would do personalized drawings of your car. When we were contemplated buying a 4th generation Miata I thought maybe I’d get him to do one of that car too. I couldn’t find him. The website carartz.com is for sale and searching for “Dave Scott artist Scotland” turns up a bunch of David Scott’s, but none in the caricature business.

Didn’t matter, we didn’t get a 4th gen Miata, we got another 2nd gen, so that caricature still stands for it. Today in my Miata Google Alert email along with the usual Redit posts and Craigslist ads were a few things from a site called RedBubble that wanted to sell me T-shirts or stickers or drawings. Curiosity got the better of me and I clicked on the drawings link and found a fellow called car2oons that does personalized caricatures of cars. Right there in his header image is not only a nice line art drawing of a 1st gen Miata, but a caricature of one as well. I looked through his portfolio and saw a line drawing of a 2nd gen car, but no caricature, so I contacted him. He replied within an hour saying he’d be happy to whip up a customized one for the CTBNL and asked for a photo.

A 12″ x 16″ is only a little more than $18 and if I watch the Hobby Lobby ads for 1/2price picture frames I can get it on the wall for around fifty bucks total. Maybe I can go ahead and complete the whole set of Miatas owned. Our first one never got modified in any appreciable way and I bet he’d be willing to lose the Euro style front plate of the one he already sells too.