Year: 2005

The Otolaryngologist Sees Into Brian

I’ve had a sore throat for about a month and a half now. Three weeks in to it I went to my family physician and he prescribed z-pack (a 5 day course of antibiotic) & 10 days worth of Zyrtec. After the 5 days of antibiotic, it still wasn’t any better, so he upped the ante to a stronger antibiotic, Levaquin for 5 days. After this second course I wasn’t any better, so he sends me to an Ear, Nose and Throat guy. My 2 week wait to get in to see the specialist was over today.

Because this was my first visit to him, he wanted a baseline, so he started out checking the ears. How embarrassing as he had to clean them out a bit before he could look in them. Then we moved onto the nose. He takes out the little plier looking things that work like snap ring pliers, when you squeeze the handles the ends *open* wider. Looks around in both nostrils and then he sprays some stuff in there. He tells me it’ll taste kind of bitter. Turns out it is a anesthesia.

Up until now we have been shining bright lights into orifices, now it is time to get up close and personal. He breaks out the foot long black spaghetti thing. It has a bright light and some fiber optics so the Doc can see inside *real* good. First in one side of the nose and then the other. The second time he goes in the full length. It is in there so far that reflexes take over and I try to swallow it. He politely asked that I don’t do that (not that I could have succeeded, but it messes up his view of my larynx. When the doctor is all done looking he tells me that my larynx looks like that of one of a heavy smoker or drinker. We can eliminate them because of my answers to the intake questionnaire, plus he would have been able to smell that sort of thing. That leaves one other thing that would make your larynx look like that. And in the slight pause that follows, the hypochondriac in me thinks the worse, until he says, “Acid Reflux.”

Turns out that more than half of all suffers of acid reflux don’t have heartburn, it shows up in other ways, sore throat, constantly having to clear your throat, funny taste in your mouth, voice cracking and others.

Can I sue my parents for passing along faulty genes? First it was medicine to lower my blood pressure, then we started medicine to lower my cholesterol and now comes medicine to unflux my acid…

Started up, went down, back up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 230

Any Man Who Falls Behind, Is Left Behind

Decided to go ahead and wash the car. I couldn’t use the excuse that it might rain anymore, I’ve used it for the past week or so, and the weather forecast was for more of the same for the next tens days…

I knew I shouldn’t have watched the game. The FRS lost to the Yankees tonight on ESPN. They lost on Thursday as I watched on ESPN2 and then they lost Saturday afternoon on FOX with me on the couch. The Sox won big, 17-1, on Friday when they weren’t on TV, I didn’t even listen. So I shouldn’t have watched them on TV tonight, they probably would have won the game.

The only thing that saved the night was right after the game I found TDPM playing and it was only an hour in. 🙂

Barbossa: Why thank ye, Jack.
Jack Sparrow: You’re welcome.
Barbossa: Oh, not you. We named the monkey Jack.

Started down, went up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 228

I’ve Lost The Will To Blog

And here is why: Feeling ‘blogged down’ on the Internet

And because Matt DiFebo is the managing editor of The Daily Tribune News in Cartersville, GA. and probably has several Pulitzer Prizes on the rickety pine shelf behind his desk, if I ever do blog again I’ll be sure it is about politics or education and that it will “incite discussion on these very important topics.”

Oh yeah, did I mention that we went to Kroger’s tonight and that I couldn’t get any luncheon meat for next week’s sandwiches because the Deli Counter was closed. No? Good, I wouldn’t want to bother Matt with that…

Started down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 227

I Got My Stuff

In an effort to keep our country’s economy going strong, I’ve made a few purchases recently. My Camp Mazdamiata T-shirt came in the mail yesterday and is in the wash as I type, for wear this weekend. This past Monday both my WTF stickers and my LOB sticker came in the mail.

One of the WTF stickers is on my cabinet at work and the other I may stick on the car. SWMBO has decreed that it can’t go on the bumper, so my only other option is to put it on the inside of the trunk lid with the other assorted stickers.

The LOB sticker was printed off center. There was a white area on the left between the edge and the black oval outline while on the right the black was touching the edge. On Tuesday I used the Cafepress contact form and complained. Within a couple hours I had a reply that was apologetic and said they would sent me another one. It also said, “You may keep it or give it to a friend; or perhaps you can donate it locally.” Right, I’m sure the Salvation Army would appreciate something like that. Today, Mr. UPS Man dropped off the corrected sticker and it looks much better. For a change, excellent customer service from someone.

Started up, went down, still down.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 227

Hey, I Thought That Name Sounded Familiar

Watching the FRS and the Yankees play in a window in the corner of the screen. Baseball coverage used to consist of two or maybe three guys in a both calling the action and filling the lulls between action with esoteric stats like, a player’s batting average with runners on 1st and 3rd with 2 outs or less in a two run game against a left handed pitcher. Then we graduated to adding a sideline reporter, usually an ex-player, that they can cut away to for updates or human interest stuff. Now a days, especially for TV, the ex-jock has been replaced by a pretty female face. I’m not saying these women aren’t qualified or are unknowledgable, but being attractive is definitely high on the hiring requirement checklist. The last step will be to let these women have traditionally female names. The lovely talking head for FOX is named Sam Something or other and for ESPN (tonight’s TV outlet) we have Erin Andrews.

Hey, wait a minute I recognize that name. I actually blogged about her back a couple of years ago when she was a back in the studio score reader for TBS. I guess sideline reporting for ESPN is a step up…

Started up, went down, back up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 226

That Was Close

If it were not for the egging on of a co-worker we would have had a repeat of Tuesday, June 21st. They nearly had to beg me to go put up my top. It wasn’t until I checked the radar that I ran out into the parking lot and raised the roof. Good thing, as it was already raining nicely as I walked out and back, but no more than 5 minutes after I got back to my desk it came down in buckets, big buckets.

I guess the air is still saturated from Dennis, because we have had at least 4 more heavy thunder showers since that first one.

Started down, went up, back down, back up, still up.
Miata Top Transitions since 01/01/05: 224

3 Things That Are Certain In Life

1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Getting screwed by a lawyer

The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s.

“May I help you?” she asked.

“I want to see Natalie,” the man replied.

“Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else,” said the madam.

“No. I must see Natalie,” was the man’s reply.

Just then, Natalie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit.

Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten 100 dollar bills, gave them to Natalie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Natalie. Natalie explained that no one had ever come back two nights in a row–too expensive–and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Natalie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Natalie and they went upstairs.

After their session, Natalie questioned the man. “No one has ever used me three nights in a row. Where are you from?” she asked.

The man replied, “South Carolina.”

“Really” she said. “I have family in South Carolina.”

“I know,” the man said. “Your father died and I am your sister’s attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance.”