This memo was forwarded to few folks at our plant today. It concerns a staffing change at our main plant in Florham Park. Why I got it I’m not sure, but I’m glad I did because I found it entertaining. The Name has been changed to protect the “innocent.”
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I am pleased to announce that Fred Flintstone has accepted the position of Procurement Commodity Manager beginning 7/19/04. Over the last 6 years, Fred has held various roles in Engineering with increasing responsibility. Most recently, Fred held the position of Project Manager with direct responsibility over the RHNG project. Fred has played an integral role in managing this project through a successful design freeze. Due to the critical nature of this project, Fred will continue as Project Manager until the electronic version is successfully in production.
Fred has a B.S. in Mechanical Engineering from Really Smart Guy Institute, an M.S. in Engineering Management from Cheesy Online University, and an MBA in Strategic Management from Snotty Nose University.
In Fred’s new role, he will manage several key commodities including machined parts. Fred will be responsible for developing and implementing the strategic direction of these commodities in an effort to drive negative net inflation, globalization, and supplier performance. Fred will be reporting to me.
Please join me in congratulating Fred on his new assignment.
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RHNG stands for Red Hat Next Generation which going to be our latest and greatest valve if it ever comes to fruition. It has been stuck on one thing or another for couple three years now. So is this a promotion or a demotion? Before, top dog engineer on the company’s valve of the future, now, buyer of bitsy valve parts, you tell me. Just what is a successful design freeze anyway? He got the design so screwed up we are frozen with no chance to go back or forward in any attempt to make this a viable product? Whatever, here is my hearty congratulations to you Fred, salute!